I was having a conversation awhile back about leadership with a fellow horse owner and rider. They asked me quite directly whether I thought we should think of ourselves as our horse’s leader or not, because true partnership doesn’t require a leader. This was interesting to me and really got me thinking, as leadership encompasses so many wonderful qualities that allow us to be there for our horses in situations throughout your partnership when he needs guidance, encouragement, and confidence. Of course, my answer wasn’t as straightforward as they may have expected it to be. I took the time to think about it and gave them a long-winded answer. I’m finding myself revisiting the topic again, this time taking the time to write about it. As someone who respects all ethical walks of training, I’m not here to say I disagree with anyone who has the ideology that we shouldn’t think of ourselves as leaders in relationship with horses. However, I thought it would be beneficial to share my personal thoughts and reflections about positive leadership, what it means to me, and why it’s important when it comes to training.
Being a good leader means providing psychological safety for your horse. Your horse relies on you to not load them into a trailer with a rotten floor, or not to ride them into a place that could get them killed. Because our prefrontal cortex is further developed than our horses, it’s our responsibility to think like a leader. Our horses trust that we’ll feed them and handle them in a manner that won’t cause undue stress or physical pain. Being a good leader means knowing when your horse is having a bad day and changing up your ride so your horse still succeeds. It means being aware of any physical issues that are impacting your horse’s performance. Being a good leader also means knowing when we’re having a bad day, and being self-aware enough to take it a little easier on our horses if we’re tense and on edge. A good leader assesses risk in order to protect their horse. We check the paddocks and footing for safety. We check our horse’s water troughs to make sure nothing crawled into them overnight that could introduce bacteria into their water.
Leadership, in my opinion, means we can respond to our horse’s needs and stressors. It also means we’re in touch with our own needs. Leaders problem solve so their horses don’t feel overfaced. A good leader understands that they’re responsible for their own emotions. Our horse can’t “make us” angry or anxious. If a good leader is faced with these emotions, they’ll recognize they might be stuck and choose to further their education so a healthier path towards their riding goals can be laid.
A negative leader is likely to decrease a horse’s sense of psychological safety by demanding “correct” behavior through impulsivity and force. Let’s say your horse refuses to cross water. Instead of allowing investigative behavior and letting your horse build confidence through your patience and empathy, a negative leader would be more likely to spank the horse until they crossed it. Both actions result in the horse ending up on the other side of the water, but one method gave the horse courage and the other “gave the horse something to cry about.”
A vital part of leadership, in my opinion, is regulating our emotions. Our brain is incredible and our emotions are there to help us feel safe. We might know other ways to address common misbehaviors from our horses, but stress can cause us to act out in the moment and think of better solutions later on. The key to reacting better in the moment is to know what tools to use, how to use them, and how prepared you are in the case of needing to use them. A strong leader responds to their horse in a way that elicits a response in return, not a reaction from fear.
Here are a few items off my personal checklist that I often run through in my head when facing a challenge with a horse:
- Am I allowing the horse to be curious and investigate the things he’s unsure of?
- Am I staying open minded enough to learn more about what’s going wrong here? Am I willing to be vulnerable and reach out to a mentor who can help me? Am I staying humble enough to remind myself that if this is a recurring issue, there could be another way to help this horse that I’m unaware of?
- Am I recognizing moments where the horse feels tense, and compromising enough in the training plan to meet him where he’s at today instead of trying to force my pre-planned training agenda on him?
- Am I remaining empathetic to the horse? If I were to imagine I could only react to what I associate with a situation and how it feels in the moment, would I want to be here? Am I providing the horse with enough support to succeed?
- Am I able to make the horse more comfortable with what I’m asking him to do? If so, how?
Looking at leadership in this light changes the perspective from someone who demands respect and obedience from their horse at all times, to someone who cares for our horse’s safety and wellbeing, which is a goal for all ethical horse trainers. As we navigate the science of our horse’s brain and our own, it’s important to explore some of the taboo terminologies in more depth. My advice to you is if you’re leading through positive leadership, you’re on the right track. Positive leadership means leaving a positive impact on your horse every time you show up. If that’s your goal, keep it up!
Thanks for reading. Do you have a taboo subject you’d like my opinion on? Feel free to send it over, and I’d love to give my feedback. Make your next ride a confident, connected, and harmonious one. And most of all, have fun!
–Kimberly